My dear precious Max,
You are 1 month old today! This last month since you were born seemed so long, probably because mommy worried so much about you and suffered from lack of sleep each and every day. Nevertheless, mommy is so excited for this first milestone and hope you will be growing bigger and stronger soon.
You have the most beautiful eyes. You were awake from the moment you were born and you stared at me with your big, deep, dark eyes, and mommy instantly connected with your. You must have gotten those soulful eyes from your daddy. I have always been very jealous of his eyes and wished mine had a fraction of the luster and character, so I am very thankful that he has passed them on to you. As days pass by, your lashes have grown longer too. I am sure it will be as full and long as your daddy and brother’s.
You began to transition from 2 hour per feeding to 2.5 hour per feeding in the last week or so, and two days ago you even went without food for 3 hours for the first time! I know it is a small change, but mommy has hope that you will soon be able to regularly last 3 hours between feedings. Even though you could only sleep short stretches at a time (thus sleeplessness for mommy), but it is the incremental improvement that gives mommy hope and get through each day.
You got infant acne on your 20th days! Since then, I’ve found more on your face and forehead. I missed your beautiful smooth skin so much. In the meantime, I wash your face carefully everyday and hope it will clear up very soon.
You cry fiercely right before bed time every night. You cry very hard around 9PM to 10PM every night, right around the time I put your brother Ravi to bed. I helplessly lay awake in Ravi’s bed and hear your cry, unable to come to your rescue. We don’t know why you cry so much specifically at this time. We made sure you diaper was clean and you were fed, and you were being carried and rocked the whole time. But you keep crying till it is well passed 10PM each night.
You are a quiet observer. In the last month, you have given me a peek into your emerging personalty. Unlike your brother and me, you appeared to be a deep thinker and observer. Sometimes when you are awake, you are content with quietly staring out to every direction with your big deep eyes and curious about everything. You look so focused with your eyes, and for a short while you would be so deeply absorbed into whatever you are looking at and thinking of. This period of concentration is only terminated when you wanted our attention again.
When mommy holds you in her arms, that feeling of love and joy surpassed all that mommy had imagined when you were not yet born. Sometimes just staring at you while you are sleeping brings all the happiness back to her tired body again. What magic! How incredible it is to feel so much pleasure from such a little person.